David wants to amputate his right leg... and replace it instead with a sproingy prosthetic. He has a pinched sciatic nerve - which if he were to actually see the chiropractor and/or physiotherapist, he could probably fix. But right now he thinks the best idea would be to amputate said limb and get a cool prosthetic. I'm hiding the the hack saws.
David: "This is not fun any more."
Me: "Was this really ever fun?"
David: "It had novelty for a while. I was enjoying the wallowing."
Me: "Maybe there's somebody out there with a voodoo doll who is sticking pins in your hip!"
David: "That would mean that somebody out there really hates me."
Me: "I think that's the only logical explanation, I mean, other than you not going to the doctor, chiropractor or physiotherapist. So Big Guy, who did you piss off?"
David: "I really don't know."
Me: "Must be one of those many women who, when they throw themselves at you for sex, you turn down on account of the fact that you're married to me."
David: "That must be it."
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